This master bathroom remodel project has officially become epic.
Not epic as in: that wave was so epic! Let’s paddle out for another one!
Epic like: this project is so epically dragged out somebody’s gonna get all face stabbed up in hurr.
I’ve always been honest with you guys, and I’m feeling especially honest today. If this master bathroom doesn’t get all completo in the next 72 hours I’m going back to the French Riviera with my girl Rachael. If I wanted to live out of a suitcase for 6 months at a time, I wouldn’t be doing it in Utah County.
Would you?
Don’t answer that. It was kind of a trick question trap.
But seriously you guys, this master bath is officially ridiculous.
In fact, if I were to show you the photos I took of my master bedroom (which is attached to this monstrosity of a project via gutted doorway) you’d stop reading this post ASAP-like to call child services and report the unsafe living conditions of my household.
It’s super sketch, just like my current frame of mind.

Alright, now that we’ve established my fragile mental state, let’s do a walk through of the master bathroom. We’re officially at stage 3: aka the-part-where-mama-starts-throwing-shiz.
(I don’t usually refer to myself in 3rd person, I think that’s nuts, which gives you an indication of just how far I’ve digressed)
The whole idea for the master bathroom was literally sketched out on the back of a utility bill, sans architect or anyone else who knows what they’re doing. It’s been an experiment since day one, and so far so good! I think! But I’m not totally sure! Probably!
If you’ll remember (I can’t think back that far, January was eons ago) the walk-in-closet was a huge waste of space attached to the bathroom; it came with a HUGE built-in gun closet and since I’m a pretty big fan of gun control, I was thrilled to give that bad boy the axe while giving us an additional 4 feet of space to work with for a walk-in steam shower.
It’s the little trade-offs that all make it worthwhile! I think! I’m sure!
I literally walked from one side of the old closet to the other, put my hands out the full length of my wingspan and whipped them around like I was flying, “yeah, let’s tear out the gun closet! And make a walk-in steam shower instead!” And since there was no one around to hear me, we started sledgehammering that very afternoon. It’s amazing how fast you can tear stuff out when you have no idea what comes next.
At that point, when I told the contractor and my husband (2 different dudes) I wanted 4 speakers and a couple of lights on the ceiling in my theoretical steam shower, and oh would they mind building a bench for me? no one blinked.
The contractor, Bart, threw out the idea of a “modesty wall” for the half-shower-wall next to the toilet, and I since I couldn’t think of a good enough reason to say no at the time, we are now the proud owners of a “modesty wall”.
I’ll let you know how that works out.
At the very least, it cost us half as much in glass, which is way, way, WAY more expensive than it has any right to be.
A Jacuzzi tub was indisputable from the get-go. It was pretty much the reason we tore out the old bathroom in the first place.
Our old and moldy jetted tub was never installed properly so before we even bought the house, water was rerouting into the laminate flooring and molding the sub-floor underneath. These are the sort of things you don’t notice when you’re young and dumb and buying your very first grown-up house. So imagine if you will, 10 years of use and two-children’s-worth-of-abuse later and you’ll understand why my teenaged daughter fell through the sub-floor into the garage while we were ripping out said master bathroom.
No worries, it’s all fixed now!
The new jetted tub is fabulous, and some seriously sturdy floor separates it from the garage ceiling this time.
In fact, the entire bathroom is pretty much kid proof. We had the kids test it out for us over the course of the very cold and boring winter, and so far they haven’t found any weak spots. And we all know that where weak spots of any sort are concerned, kids are the first ones to find them.
*AHEM*
But look! A sneak peek at the complete master bathroom remodel project COMPLETE, completo, en serio.
Did I mention the master bath is complete? It only took 6 months.
What? Do you operate faster than that?
Don’t tell me, it will only hurt my feelings and damage our friendship.

Here’s your sneak peek at next week’s full master bathroom remodel reveal!
You guys. If you could only see what’s happened since this picture was taken. You would die. You will die next week, when I do the full reveal.
Stick around, it’s worth seeing the before and after of this blessed, awful, amazing, beautiful, nightmare of a project.
— Big fat thanks to Lowe’s for helping us get this project from vague idea to finished perfection, and to Jacuzzi for getting a new tub in my life and master bathroom. —
You are such a brave woman……remodels! Eeeekkk! It looks beautiful, can’t wait to see the final reveal and I’m very, very, very jealous!
I’ll be over for a steam shower party!
Please just do me a favor for one minute. Indulge this Internet stranger and think about how amazingly lucky you are to not only have any plumbing at all but on top of that to have the prosperity and connections to remodel your bathroom like this.
I know it’s been a headache for you to have that bathroom out of commission for so long but sometimes it’s nice to count our blessings.
Did I miss the big reveal? Has that post happened yet?