feeling under the weather.

Charming says to me yesterday morning:

Charming: Mama, I don’t feel good. I think I should stay home from preschool. I don’t want to get *my kids* sick.

Me: You’re going to lie here next to me quietly and let me sleep if you stay home from preschool?

C: I will be as quiet as a mouse. I am sick. It wouldn’t be fair to go to preschool and get *my kids* sick mama, that would be mean. I will lie next to you and play quietly with my toys, or watch SpongeBob on your computer with headphones and you can sleep. Mama you need sleep, I will be so quiet.

What actually happened after I called in sick to preschool was that Charming practiced his new W.W.F. moves on me and my ribs. For 2 1/2 hours. He took turns jumping on me, tickling me, shouting in my ear, hitting me with pillows. Any time I would start to drift off to sleep he would start pinching me.

Me: Why are you torturing me?!

C: Mama, I can’t be alone. You have to take care of me.

{cue the violins}

Me: You promised! You promised me you would play with your toys!! You lied!

C: My toys aren’t very interesting to me anymore, I’d like new ones.

Me: Lies! LIES!

C: Mama, it’s your job to take care of me. If you go to sleep what am I supposed to do?

Me: I am NOT YOUR ENTERTAINMENT! You should have gone to Preschool!

C: I feel much better now. Can you make a craft for me, because I’m so bored?

Me: I feel like I’m dying Charming, DYING. I cannot get out of bed.

C: {Nonplussed} Fix me a snack please.

It’s lies, all lies. Don’t be taken in by their adorable, charming faces and sweet breath. They’re little manipulators at heart.

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Allison

Hello there! I'm Allison Czarnecki, founder + editor of Petit Elefant, a blog all about style on a budget for every part of your life: style / home / travel / family. I do a lot of how-to beauty + style tutorials, travel posts, easy recipes, home remodel projects, and cool DIY crafts you totally want to try. I'm super happily married (to a hot Polish immigrant) and am the mother of two kids, a daughter and son, all of whom are featured here on the regular. We live in the country but we're a little bit rock + roll. Welcome!

13 Comments

  1. Hannah :

    oh, boy! i hope you can get some sleep in. i think charming would get along quite well with my preschooler…

  2. Petit Elefant :

    hannah,

    no sleep for the dying. oh well. preschool tomorrow!

  3. Emily :

    Ah, good intentions…they don't last long with preschoolers. My DH's favorite thing to do when our older kids claim sick is to put them to work around the house. If they stay home from school (unless deathly, truly ill of course), they do chores, babysit and work. Believe me they don't put that thermometer in hot water again!

  4. Azúcar :

    HAHA! Lying liars who lie.

    I gave birth to one of those too.

  5. Petit Elefant :

    Susan,

    How do they know these things? Little stinkers.

    Jill,

    I think it's inborn. Mine are exceptional negotiators/manipulators.

    Emily,

    That's hilarious. I am smarter today than I was yesterday, feigned cough and all. He will be going to preschool tomorrow with bells attached to his coat.

    Azucar,

    Lying liars indeed. I own that book.

    For real.

  6. vanessa :

    WWHHHYYY

    Why do they lie to us like that and we always give them another change.

    Its cause they are just so flippin cute!

  7. Susan :

    if i even look like i might want to take a nap, my face becomes my daughters favorite toy…no fair. i hope you feel better soon.

  8. Jill K :

    How do kids come up with all this stuff?

    Even my baby is a dirty little manipulator already…

  9. Erin :

    darn kid! so sorry you are sick!

  10. Petit Elefant :

    Vanessa,

    Well I'm a smarter mom today than I was on Monday. That little whippersnapper won't get past me this time.

    Erin,

    Thank you. Darn kid.

  11. Petit Elefant :

    Marie,

    Little stinker! I'm totally beguiled.

  12. Naomi :

    Yeah, I have one of those at home, too. Only Jasper is slightly less verbal and more into biting.